Thursday, August 7, 2014

Start being authentic & stop caring about what others think of you

By Darek Lovell via Collective Evolution, 2 August 2014



It is human nature to want love, to want approval  and to feel accepted. Where this becomes an issue however, is when these wants get in the way of you truly being and acting authentic. I used to care so much about what others thought that I spent years of my life growing up with little connection and feared people knowing who I really was. The truth was, I was even scared of being who I really was. I was not being my authentic self and had created so many stories of who I was and wanted to be. Slowly as I grew older I naturally became more in tune with myself and realized how important it really was for me to start being ME.

At the tender age of 19, for lack of a better term, I came out of the closet. When I finally accepted myself and let go of what others might think of me, my entire world shifted and began to progress more quickly than I had ever imagined. Rather than staying in the fear state of not being accepted, I accepted myself and in return I began to create strong connections and bonds that I had never experienced prior to my personal acceptance.

When we are trying to create an impression or act a certain way, it is nearly impossible to authentically connect. How can you expect to have powerful relationships when you don’t have a strong relationship with yourself? Trying to be someone you are not will always leave you feeling a void within yourself.

The fact of the matter is, people will judge and some will talk about you, your actions or your beliefs. Even more so, and what matters the most, is that you will allow the space for others to accept you when you are just being YOU! The average person in your life wants to see you do great things, wants to see you feel comfortable in your own skin, so believe in the goodness of others! Focusing on the negative and judgement from others is enough to send you over the edge and does nothing for your own growth and happiness.

If this article finds you in a space of insecurity or judgement set the intention for you to become accepting of yourself and others. Just by sending the energy out to the universe and by setting intention, you are creating change. Celebrate your strengths, accept your weaknesses and forgive yourself!


Posted with permission from CE

10 comments:

podsmagi said...

Nice one!!!!

!'m from Sirius and I don't care

Laron said...

That is a big step there Pod! =)

Rainbow Warrior said...

Authenticity has been my focus recently. I feel the worst lies are the ones we tell ourselves.

LightPaige said...

At the tender age of 44, I STILL struggle with pure authenticity around certain groups as a method for "keeping the peace." But as I hold on to my truth and stand in my authentic self, I find that it pisses a lot of people off, especially those narcissists who are used to having a following of yes-men. Sadly for me, that's most everyone I know.. in the "real" world anyhow. But I wholeheartedly agree with the writer. Of course we should be who we are and love ourselves purely, without condition. My only point is, as a Sensitive, an Empath, a person who feels others' emotions and judgments by energy alone, it's requiring thicker skin than I've been able to grow. And that's something that takes ongoing focus, work and intention. If anyone has any pointers on growing thicker skin, I welcome your advice! :-)

Fantastic Fox said...

“Being honest may not get you a lot of friends but it’ll always get you the right ones” - John Lennon

https://fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/263454_352591834855147_690842153_n.jpg

Rainbow Warrior said...

p.s. I didn't realize this posted as a direct reply to you, podsmagi. That's just how it goes when I use my phone to comment. It's always a surprise! lol

Rainbow Warrior said...

I am all of those things as well and also very sensitive and thin-skinned, so to speak. The way I deal with it is that I am always myself, but I don't necessarily let it all hang out, if that makes sense?!? We are all on our own unique journey in this life and if someone is interested in what I'm all about, I am more than happy to share what I know. If they aren't, I'm also happy to NOT share. Jehovah's Witnesses have always perplexed me the way they go door to door to recruit new members into their congregation. I am always polite when they make their monthly rounds because I know they have good intentions. However, to me, spirituality absolutely MUST come from within and can never be sold door to door. I found my spiritual path and I give everyone else their space to do so as well. (or not) I hope that is what you meant?

Rachelle said...

Very wise, RW...and very sage advice. LP, for me, authenticity has more to do with the inner self than the outer. In other words, it means that you are strong enough within yourself to not be swayed by the latest fad in belief systems. You are able to stand within your own truth regardless of what is going on around you. But, this does not imply that you should shout it to the rooftops and challenge anyone who has a different point of view. RW is correct in pointing out the importance of knowing yourself well enough to be able to share when asked but wise enough to know when not to. I believe it is imperative to learn to be the observer, not only of other people, but most importantly, yourself. This is accomplished by observing your own thoughts, feelings, and emotions and identifying the root cause for any pain or anger you experience. If someone hurts my feelings or makes me angry, then there is something within me that needs to be healed and released. I've found that it's not so much about becoming "thick-skinned", but more about taking responsibility for my own feelings. The only way someone/something can affect you is if you allow it. As a fellow intuitive empath, I understand the difficulties you are facing. It takes a lot of practice and inner work to get to the place where you can see and feel everything that is going on around you and not be personally affected. The method I use is to create/visualize a white bubble of light encompassing my entire being providing a protective barrier to negative energies. It also helps to know you're not alone:)

Linda said...

Hey LP. I agree with both comments above. Rachelle's idea about the field I think is a good one, and it's really all about intention and holding focus on ourselves and how we're resonating. Personally I would use UV blue because I was taught it's the colour/frequency of transmutation, but that's a personal thing.

Those in our environments reflect our mind, perhaps that part of mind is higher than our waking consciousness so by agreement you've chosen it. If it's not the case they don't they don't stay there long. It might serve to remind yourself that you're there to show strength of being one who shines on regardless. That's a big thing for others to see who are stuck in a herd mentality, without original thoughts. Really, who gives a fig if it pisses people off for you to be who you are? It's only our own state of mind we're responsible for. I would wonder if there's something you're afraid that may change if you do so. Worth pondering for all of us. I've made that a second habit, and it's served me very well. (I also have no friends! lol, definitely not true, I'm blessed with wonderful friends....and the numbers of them keep growing, but I'm not afraid of loosing them, or anything, because I know I'll see what's resonant with me, so it's that which is best IMO to focus on. What WE want to be....then things will change to match it. Hope that helps. Remember you are free to walk away at any point. We also take the strength in frequency of others thoughts, so go, sister!! We're with you. Just be it, be you!

Linda said...

I forgot to mention, that if you do visualize a field, a bubble around you and within you, you could envisage it as a powerful shimmering energy current (field), and any thought forms, be they intentional or not, will simply and completely be transmuted upon contact with it. Disintegrate, and you might find a smile appearing on your face. If any power plays are in place around you, then it won't take long for others to see that you remain unaffected, and they might leave you alone, or the relationship changes. That's how I've found it works. It's our own thoughts and focus that make the difference, and that's just a choice, a moment away. I think the issue is really what you might not to deal with or loose if you choose to just be you, but really, why? You'll free up space in your environment that reflect the real you. :) Just a hunch, I might be totally off-base.